With permission, I'm pulling a post from my sister's blog. My sister is an AMAZING mother of 4 1/2 (one on the way) and is having some pretty intense pregnancy issues. I will never know how she manages to do everything she does and keep all her "balls in the air". She's truly amazing!
Tyler (who is mentioned in the post) is 3.5 years old, but is the size of a large 5 year old child, which makes the situation described a little more difficult to deal with.
(Also, Mindi, I thought this might help with your last post, realizing, however, that the situations might not be closely related at all.)
Special Needs (by Sandi)
Having a special needs child is so full of rewards, however, there are some days that you have to dig to find them, others they just appear! I love it when, randomly, Tyler will burst through the door and give me a hug and a kiss for no apparent reason. That makes my mommy-heart feel awesome!
There are also challenges that go with this sort of thing as well. How do you get others to understand? How do you help them cope? These are two questions swirling through my mind right now. He's causing trouble in the nursery, and they want me to tell them how to "fix it". The problem is...I have no idea! His whole world was thrown into turmoil this summer with the lack of structure to his schedule. It's not his fault, they know that, but there are other little children that they're worried about as well. I don't blame them. There are days I'm at my wits end with him, so I know that frustration very well. The only difference between them and me is I still love him very dearly at the end of the day (when he's angelically sleeping...LOL, just kidding, I love him regardless). My best reply to give to them when put on the spot? If he's causing that much trouble, please come get us, we totally understand (been there, done that). They are in the process of getting an extra nursery aid to help out in there (Ty isn't the only one with special needs and certainly isn't the most "needy"...don't take that as a rude comment, because it's not meant that way).
Earlier today, someone asked Celeste where mommy was. She replied something that sounded like "da bom". When asked to repeat it, it sounded more like "da bum". Yes, I am a bum, but I also like to think of myself at the moment as "da bum that is da bom" !! LOL, yes, I'm a nerd, that's ok - I'm at peace with that fact!!
2 comments:
Thanks, Sandi, for sharing your story. I think it's important to remember the child's parent's point of view. I think maybe it's easy to blame it on the parent, but we all know that kids come with their own personality, and in Tyler's case, a special need that makes them unique. Thanks for reminding us. Good luck with Tyler. I hope you and the nursery leaders are able to find a solution that helps everyone involved.
It is hard, I'm sure, with a special needs child. I used to work with them after I graduated high school and was in transition of dental assisting and testing, ect. So I know a thing or two about dealing with all sorts of special needs children. I have a huge soft spot for them. I comment mothers/fathers/guardians who have to deal with it day in and day out. They all deserve a tremendous amout of gold stars and rewards! I love that she said some rewards just show up, others she has to look for, cute.
In response to my "Nursery Woes", I guess I should've been more clear, but I was typing with a 6 month old on my lap and trying to hurry. I have talked with EVERYONE about that girl. Her mother even knows about the issue, but the Bishop wants her mother where she is (teaching?) because it will keep the mother active. The father has been deported to Peru. Neither here nor there...the nursery leaders know about this girl because they have to monitor her the entire time she's in there. It's sad really, but the primary president feels that every child has the right to be in there. I say, YES, every child has the right to be in there, but EVERY child has the right to feel safe and loved and have fun in there, and there are about 4 that don't because of this girl. It's just sad.
Also, another clarification that I didn't make, he does have separation anxiety...when he was about 22 months his dad went into the ER and had people working on him, tubes, machines, beeping, ect, and then ended up in ICU, SOOO, little man saw this and from then on was different...make sense? His pediatrician said he had some disorder, can't remember the name, where he saw something tramatic and then he's the way he is....attached to my apron strings.
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