There are several secrets that have been deemed "worthy" to keep from your kids, such as Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. I grew up having the truth about these "people" kept from me and I was blissfully happy (and ignorant...and naive).
I still remember the day my parents took me into their bedroom to tell me "the truth", though I don't remember how old I was. I wasn't devastated, but I WAS disappointed. It took just a little bit of the magic away from my absolute favorite holiday (Christmas). After they told me, they asked me to keep it a secret from my 2 younger siblings so I didn't ruin their fun. I immediately went out to play with the rest of my family and almost let it slip. What can I say? I was VERY disappointed!
Although I plan to keep my kids as in the dark as I was during my younger years, I've thought about this off and on for awhile now and wonder...How old is too old to believe in these characters?
I have quite awhile before I even have to consider "telling" my oldest the truth about any of this, but since Christmas is just around the corner, which means that we're gearing up to play Santa, I thought I'd ask all you pros out there. When did you tell your kids "the truth"? How did you do it so you could still keep the magical secret alive for your younger kids? And, of course, how old do you think is too old for them to still believe?
3 comments:
I don't know if my 2 cents is worth much more than that, but I'll give it anyway.
I learned about Santa and the birds and the bees in the same year. Gotta love the school bus! Anyway, I was very young, and my parents didn't plan on telling us. But when we came home with questions, they had to give us answers. I remember going to school later (I think it was a few years later) and having a friend tell me that Santa brought them something. I was dumbfounded that they ACTUALLY still believed in Santa! After all, we weren't kids anymore. Of course, every seven year old thinks they're grown up at some point.
I think that 8 is the maximum age a child can believe in Santa. After that (and maybe a little before) a few things will probably happen. They'll probably get made fun of by their peers. They're friends might tell them before you do, and that could have some trust consequences.
Now, I know that someone somewhere will disagree with my answer, and that's totally fine. I guess I'll just be telling my kids sooner than they will.
After we learned the Great Truth, it was fun to help keep the magic alive for our younger sibs. We hid eggs at Easter, and laid on the make believe thick around Christmas time. It was just fun to help out with the grown-up stuff and be "in" on the secret. I think how your child takes the news all depends on how you give it to them. Make it fun to keep it up with the younger ones, and they'll be excited too. Not just disappointed.
As Deborah did...we learned young in our family about this kind of stuff...and honestly once you get the birds and bee's talk, you grow up a bit more and tend to see things how they are. Well I did anyway.
I think around 8-9 is a good age. They are going to hear it from friends at school or the older kids who feel it necessary to ruin little kids lives and taunt them about the truth of things.
When kids come home with questions I think its fair to assess the situation and see if they are old enough to handle it...usually they are.
And like Deb...it was fun to keep the 'magic' alive for our younger siblings. :)
I was very sheltered I guess and didn't find out the truth until I was 9 or 10- and then only because my younger sister figured it out and my parents realized they needed to tell me too! My oldest just turned eight and I still feel like he's too young to have the magic revealed. This may be the last Christmas he believes...who knows? We also homeschool so there's less worry what peers will tell him. He and his barely 6 brother have asked a couple times if Santa/Tooth Fairy are real or logistic questions and I always just ask them, "What do you think?" As long as they answer they still believe I'll keep the magic alive!
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