But N is most definitely a BINKY BABY! And it's not just any binky that he wants. It's this one:
My sister got him one of these babies. It's called a Wubbanub. They have several other kinds of them with various colors of binkies attached.
N cannot live without this monkey binky. An example of this happened just today. He was crying and acting hungry, so I tried to nurse him. He latched on for a second, then started wailing at maximum volume. I put in his binky and let him hug the monkey and he quieted right down and fell asleep. I'm being passed up for a monkey!
Anyway, because he's so attached to this monkey binky, I'm a little worried about what will happen when we "get" to take it away and be done with the whole binky thing.
When do you usually take away a binky? (I've heard of some experts who say to take it away at 6 months or so, so they don't have cognitive memories of having it.) How have you done it so you have success (and little whining/crying/fighting)?
4 comments:
I've read that at 3 months, a baby should be able to "self-soothe." But that is totally different than being able to find their binky, put it in their mouth, and go back to sleep!
In my opinion, 6 months is too early. Of course, I didn't think that when S was 6 months - I wanted the binky gone! But he was going through a lot at the time (with his helmet), so we decided to let him continue to have the comfort of a binky.
When he turned one, we started weaning him off the binky by taking it away at nap time and only letting him have it at night. Then, after a few days, maybe a week, we took it away for good.
The first two days he took a very long time to fall asleep. Probably about an hour. After that, he was fine.
The only problem I see with my technique is that S still has a stuffed animal that soothes him to sleep. So I traded one for the other. I'm fine with an animal though.
If N is attached to the monkey as well as the binky, maybe get him a small soft animal that he can learn to snuggle with and not suck on. Then when he is weaned off the binky, the transition won't be so difficult.
If you are worried about binkies shaping N's mouth or other things like that, talk to your pediatrician or N's dentist. We did, and my pediatrician assured me that I wasn't causing any damage by giving him a binky at 9 months.
My opinion is that while they're still babies (and that goes beyond 6 months), there is nothing wrong with them having them. It's a comfort for them and our society seems so set on taking comforts away from our babies so that they become independent and disciplined, etc., but in all reality, giving them the comforts they need when they are small is what makes them healthy and independent (I've done lots of research on the matter and have seen these results, on both ends, in my children).
Granted, I DO think it is unhealthy to let them have their binkies into toddler-hood. With my kids, we weaned them from the binkies at about 18 months. And I remember totally stressing over it because my kids were ADDICTED to them and had to have them all the time. But actually, in my own experience, that was a great age because they were old enough to understand when you explained to them that it was "all gone" (or that they are big boys now, or however you want to explain it to them), and I only had one rough night with each of them, but after that, they were fine without it and it was a piece of cake, really.
I'm not saying 18 months is the age for every kid, because I know that a lot of moms do it much sooner, and some later, and it works for them. I'm just saying what personally worked for my kiddos.
I agree, 6 months is too early. We weaned K from the binky by the time he was 18 months and thought we were doing well.
This doesn't help you much, but I think you and your husband should decide when to wean your baby. Every kid is different.
As for the how-to-do-that, you could try many different ways. Some kids are okay with cold turkey, meaning the binkies magically disappear with the philosophy, out of sight, out of mind.
Some kids you have to show them that the binkies are being put away or thrown away (but I hate throwing perfectly good things away).
But the funniest technique I heard from one of my sister's friends. Their son was 3 years old (way too old for a binky) and they were getting desperate, so they nailed (seriously) the binky to the wall, a few inches shorter than he was. So if he wanted to suck on his binky, he had to go over to the wall, bend down at an angle and suck on it at the wall. They said he realized it wasn't worth the effort after 2 days. Hahaha!♠
I think all these women have left great comments. I'm not sure if I can contribute more.
But, I'll say my peice anyways! :)
J didn't take a 'soother' (as we Canadians call them), but now B has one, and he's 14 months and I think it's affecting his speech. He just hums when he wants something now, because it's still in his mouth. Our ped in Montana told us to take it away by 6 months, but like most moms, we'd rather them happy then not.
18 months is a good age, especially if they are entering into a nursery or playgroup, they won't be the only one in there with one.
My sister and her husband were able to take away my neices soother by leaving it for Santa at Christmas. They told her the babies at the North Pole needed soothers, and if she left hers for Santa to give the babies, she would get a huge doll house. And she did and never looked back. You can also do that with the Easter Bunny, or any other character they look up too. ??? Just ideas! I say this now, but when it comes time to take away B's, it'll be brutal!
Good luck!
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